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Rumors : Summary

Neil Simon's farce, Rumors, gives readers an in-depth look at the lives of
ten wealthy individuals attending a dinner party. In an attempt to stay
within the social crown, the characters start unsubstantiated rumors about
their friends in an attempt to make themselves look better. The hosts of
the party, Ken Gorman, and his wife Chris must cover up the fact that a
friend of theirs, Charley Brock, has been shot in the ear lobe. They do not
know how he got shot, but they decide that he must have tried to commit
suicide, and thereby proceed to spread rumors about what they have heard in
an attempt to avoid a possible attempted suicide scandal. They first lie to
Charley's personal doctor, they lie about what happened to all of the
servants, and they finally about a second gunshot heard in the house.

When the Gormans first encounter Charley in his bedroom, they immediately
call his personal doctor at the theater to tell him that Charley feels just
fine. Chris relates the story to the doctor when she says, "Dr. Dudley, I'm
afraid there's been an accident_ Well, we just arrived here at Charley's
house about ten minutes ago, and as we were getting out of our car, we
suddenly heard this enormous_ thud_ It seemed Charley had tripped going up
the stairs_ no, wait, down the stairs. Down the stairs. But he's all
right," (13). Finally, Chris manages to explain to the doctor that Charley
had not really hurt himself in the first place and that she felt sorry to
have bothered him at the theater. After hanging up the phone, the Gormans
put Charley in the shower to wash off the blood, wrap a towel around his
head to stop the bleeding, and go back downstairs to wait for the rest of
the party guests. Lenny and Claire Ganz arrive at the party first.

Coming straight from a car accident, the Ganz's ask why Charley has not
joined them for the party. Ken Gorman explains that Charley has had a rough
day and he decided to take a nap for a little while. Lenny exclaims that he
has not had a thing to eat since breakfast and wonders where Mai Li the
cook has put all of the food. Not wanting to explain that they have
recently fired Mai Li, the Gormans fabricate a story about her having to go
back to Japan to visit her sick mother. Claire asks, "But Mai Li is Chinese,
isn't she?" The Gormans look at each other and then Chris quickly says, "I
know. Her mother was visiting Japan." As a result of this, they must ask
their friends to help them prepare dinner for their own party. They know
that if they explain to the Ganz's that they do not have enough money to
keep her in service any longer, they will fall of out favor with their
friends. For this reason, they find it necessary to fabricate stories to
explain happenings in the house. As the night progresses, they consistently
dig themselves into a deeper hole of lies.

The situation eventually gets terrible when Ken tries to hide the gun so
Charley can't find it to shoot himself again. On his way to putting in the
closet, Ken trips over Charley's slippers and discharges the gun straight
into the wall. The report occurred right next to his ear, and for the rest
of the play, Ken is almost entirely deaf. Naturally, the Gormans cannot say
that a gunshot went off in the house, so they create a variety of different
excuses to explain the sound upstairs. At first, Claire decides that a car
backfiring has the most credibility, but because of the volume of the sound,
she later changes it to a manhole cover that exploded. After some time, she
again changes the story to a can of shaving cream that exploded due to the
pressure from the manhole cover exploding. This story seems a little far-
fetched to the other guests, so she finally says, "Oh, I know. I know. I
know exactly what it was_ it was a balloon. They've been blowing up party
balloons up there all day," (43). This answer seems satisfactory enough for
everyone, and they lapse back into their normal conversations again.

The party in Rumors has a lot of humor to it, but on the other hand, it
shows just how far people will go just to be accepted by their peers.
Through deceit, the Gormans lied about Charley's health to avoid an
investigation. They lied about their lack of hired help to remain
recognized within their circle of friends, and they also lied about a
second gunshot from upstairs to avoid a panic in the house that would ruin
the dinner party. Considering the lengths that the Gormans go to to be
well-liked, it seems ironic that in the end when they discover Charley has
tried to kill himself, nobody really cares. All of of the trouble that the
Gormans went to by lying to their friends had no bearing on the outcome of
the story.